Happiness

 I had an interesting thought today. Over my past few relationships, I generally felt like they weren't right for me. I felt this strange flip-flopping between attraction and lack thereof, both appearance-wise and personality-wise. When I was in the relationship, I felt like I needed out. When I was out, I felt like I wanted them more than ever.

I always attributed this to the general notion that you want what you can't have. This might be true, but today I had another idea. Maybe I'm just unhappy, and projecting my unhappiness onto the relationship. When I'm in it, I'm unhappy and I believe I need out. When I was out, I was unhappy and suddenly started feeling like I was missing out on previous happiness.

I don't think this means I need to go back to relationships I previously deemed not fitting for me. But I think I need to learn to manage my unhappiness. It seems like it would be key to not ruining my next relationship. 

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